Innocent Ignorance
by mistlove
Summary: Verloren is a supposed omniscient being. But he has never had any knowledge of what it feels like to love someone so deeply and purely. God gave him a heart for a reason. Verloren X Eve


NO PERVERTED COMMENTS AND OR REQUESTS IN REVIEWS. RUDE REVIEWS WILL RESULT IN THE STORY BEING TAKEN DOWN.  
**Title:** Innocent Ignorance  
**Summary: **Verloren is a supposed omniscient being. But he has never had any knowledge of what it feels like to love someone so deeply and purely. God gave him a heart for a reason. Verloren X Eve  
**Author:** mistlove  
**Copyrights:** Plot is mine. Everything else belongs to GO-Comi and the author and artist.  
**Notes: **Spoilers for ch. 52. Ayanami wasn't always bad, right? Here's a story that's a little bittersweet, a different portrayal of the cruel Ayanami/Verloren we're used to. Coming up next for this pairing will be _Chaos Eve_. So… expect it. XD

Recent minor edits and added sentences. Thank you for being faithful supporters. Hope you enjoy.  
_

_Words cannot even begin to describe this feeling of strange desire for you._

Verloren sat at the edge of a low cliff, overlooking the luscious land of heaven before him. His purple eyes were intent on the beautiful woman standing in the meadow under the cliff. She was smiling, singing softly to herself as she admired the flowers in the elegant garden.

_God promised me all knowledge. And yet, I do not know what it feels like to embrace her, to hug her close like the precious woman she is to me._

He wanted to know. He wanted to know badly, the feeling of her arms around his waist and his arms around hers.

"Verloren-sama? Verloren-sama!"

Verloren snapped out of his reverie and looked down at the meadow to see the woman smiling back up at him.

"Verloren-sama, are you free?"

He hesitated. His hand gripped his scythe tightly before he jumped down from the cliff, landing near the outer ring of the meadow.

"Ah, are you hurt?" She frantically made her way over to him, her beautiful face contorted to an expression of concern.

"I am a being who cannot be harmed," he replied calmly.

She didn't even know that he couldn't be hurt. But her innocent concern for him, although he would not admit it, made him happy. Concern for him won over the fact that she hardly knew him.

"Oh... okay!" the beautiful black-haired smiled brightly. "I'm glad you are not hurt."

"... You too, cannot be hurt," Verloren said softly. Her concern was admirable, but he wondered if she was just faking it. "Did you forget that we were created the same way?"

She blinked before smiling sadly.

"No, we're different. I am divine, yet also, I am human. I hurt as any other human does. I will die too. Someday, we'll have to part..."

Something in his chest twinged in what he understood, was pain. He didn't understand. He knew what pain was. But God said that he would not experience it. And why in his chest, over his left breast?

The knowledge came back to him as his memories of the Chief of Heaven's words a few moments after his creation.  
_

_Put your hand over your left breast, Verloren. What do you feel?_

A pulsing sensation.

_That, Verloren, is perhaps the most important object in your body._

What does it do? Store my knowledge?

_It is something that is essential for survival in humans._

But I am eternal.

_Indeed you are, Verloren, but that item is not meant for your survival. It is meant to let you know what it means to feel emotions. Is it so you can feel as humans feel. To feel is a great gift. It is perhaps, my greatest creation, after you._

I must protect it then.

_Yes, your "heart" as it is called will give you insight, feeling, and flavor to your otherwise bland eternal life. It will give you more knowledge than perhaps I can bestow onto you. Let it guide you. It will teach you many things._

A gift so precious ought not to be wasted on me.

_Wasted it is not. You, Verloren, are my greatest creation. Now go, child, into the land of heaven and earth, and fulfill your duty.  
_ _

_Pain in my heart? What does this mean? Why does it hurt at the thought of Eve's death? Why does it hurt at the thought that Eve and I will someday part?_

"Verloren-sama?" Eve called gently, tilting her head in worry.

He quickly regained composure. He adjusted his black cloak absently.

"I am fine. Eve, you are a far more important being compared to me," he reprimanded in a quiet voice. "You need not call me such a respectable name. Verloren is fine."

But deep in his 'heart' he knew this was a lie. He just wanted her to become more familiar with her. To leave out cumbersome titles and statuses.

Eve pouted childishly. "I respect you too much, so I can't just do that. If '-sama' bothers you, I'm sure '-kun' will be alright with you."

Another twinge of pain in his heart.

_ It's not alright. Call me something more tender._

She was not comfortable of the idea of getting any closer to him. But he could not let her know. He must never let her know these strange chaotic feelings inside of him.

_ Eve, for you..._

"Yes, that's fine, Eve."

_I will lie. I will lie to myself to make you happy._

She smiled, satisfied."Verloren-kun then, what were you doing earlier? Just resting?"

_Stop feigning concern for me. Stop acting like you care. Stop... making me feel this way._

"I do not believe I have to answer that," Verloren answered gruffly, feeling frustrated.

Eve blushed, her smile wilting. "... I'm sorry. I did not mean to probe."

Another twinge, but of a feeling he identified as regret.

_ No. Forgive me._

"No," he apologized quickly. "I am at fault. I was merely... admiring the scenery."

_How much longer can I continue this mockery?_

The smile returned to her lips. "Ah, I too! I was admiring these beautiful flower petals."

"I saw you," he whispered.

_ I will lie to myself for you. I will fool myself into thinking I don't care. But how long... can I lie?_

She blushed, her cheeks turning a pleasant pink color. "Oh... were you watching? How

embarrassing..."

"Why?" he demanded. "You are a beauty to observe," he said before he could think.

Her cheeks flushed a little darker. "You really do know everything, even how to flatter women."

"I speak only the truth."

_Already, the lies are breaking apart..._

She pushed at him lightly, shifting from foot to foot. "You're embarrassing," she whispered.

But he sensed a bit of happiness behind her accusing tone.

_I need to know. I want you so badly, but do you feel the same way?_

"Eve... what am I to you?"

She tilted her head a little in thought.

"You're beautiful," she answered after a moment. "And you're very knowledgeable. Although I guess that's obvious," she laughed, blushing a little. "I respect you."

"... Is there nothing more?"

_Is there no compassion? Something else?_

She looked surprised by his response.

But words could not the feeling of shock he felt when she suddenly slipped her arms around him after slowly smiling at him. His scythe slipped out of his hands, clattering to the ground.

"... Yes, Verloren-kun. There is more," she said softly.

The pulsing in his chest quickened. Now he knew. He knew what it felt like to have her embrace him lovingly. And he loved it, quickly becoming addicted to it.

"I love you," she murmured gently. "You're precious to me."

_Love. The feeling of adoration or affection for another being or object. She… adores me._

"... Do not spout such mindless lies. It is unbefitting of you, Eve," he replied. Despite his words, he could not help but slip his own arms around her small waist.

"Eve is a woman who does not know how to lie," she whispered into his ear, her warm breath tickling his skin. "I do love you, Verloren-kun."

"Eve..."

_Is it alright to say it aloud…? These jumbled feelings for this woman…?_

He closed his eyes and opened his mouth, but found that no words could express feelings he didn't even understand. He closed his mouth slowly, remaining silent and relishing her warmth instead.

"We are all called to love, aren't we?" she sighed, sounding eased. "But it's a hard thing to do."

His eyes opened, widening.

_No. I don't want hollow love that is so easily distributed to many people._

"I do love everyone in heaven and on earth. Perhaps you're thinking it is easy for me to say I love you. But you're a little special, Verloren-kun." She shifted back a little and releasing one hand, she placed it over her left breast. "Here... this organ that sustains my life- it beats fast when I am with you."

_He... the Chief of Heaven also gave his daughter... a heart... _

He was suddenly conscious of his own heart.

_My heart… it's also beating fast. What does this mean?_

Wordlessly, he took her hand on her chest and guided it slowly to his. She would understand without his having to say anything.

And indeed, when her hand came into contact with his chest, she smiled. It was the most beautiful, radiant smile he had ever seen come from her.

"I'm so glad you feel the same way." She hugged him again, tenderly.

She started to loosen her grip on him after awhile but he would not let her go. Instead, he squeezed her closer. She let out a sigh before smiling, raising her arms around him in a firm hug once again.

"You're really quite cuddly, aren't you?" she whispered, giggling softly.

_Cuddly? ... A term used to describe someone who is easy to hug or embrace tenderly._

He wasn't sure of how to respond to her _compliment_, he supposed. He just wanted to express how he felt in all honesty, but he knew that was not possible. He slowly let her go, despite all his desires.

"... Eve, you're warm," he said instead, trying to take his mind off of his still frenzied feelings for her.

"Really?" She followed suit, letting him go. "Well, you feel kind of cold, even though you're all bundled up like that.

_Of course. I must feel cold to someone as kind as her. I am the being of death. The embodiment of cold, lonely death._

"If you're cold, perhaps it would be best to head to someplace warm. Yes, like my father's hearth!"

"No need." He bent down and picked up his scythe before turning away from her. One embrace from her was making him crazy for something more. He felt like this desire for more would harm to her and decided it would be best if he left.

"Ah, where are you going...?"

"I am being called. There are several souls that have lost their way to the purgatory," he lied. "I must leave."

_I must not linger here any longer._

"Ah... okay." She smiled softly, almost sadly. "Take care..."

_I'm going crazy. Your smile is driving me to breaking point._

"To you too, Eve, take care."

He let himself vanish into darkness, reappearing in the forest where they had first met. He wandered for a long time, trying to comprehend his thoughts.

"... I understand now."

He wanted Eve. To want was to have a desire, a longing for something or someone. To desire someone was to love them. To love someone was to care for them deeply. Passionately, tenderly.

He wanted to protect her always. He savored the touch, the brushing of her skin against his.

Now, he understood.

He understood the feeling in his heart now. He loved her. Eve, daughter of his creator.

He loved her more than anyone else, more than his creator, more than himself.  
_

**End Notes:** This feels rushed. And it seemed better when it was still in my mind. -_-  
Well, I hope you liked. Please review.

NO PERVERTED COMMENTS AND OR REQUESTS IN REVIEWS. RUDE REVIEWS WILL RESULT IN THE STORY BEING TAKEN DOWN.


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